Monthly Archives: June 2010

Total Poser

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I love music. I’ve told you this before. Many times. But I can’t play a single musical instrument.

Since I can’t strum away on anything to help me process, I write it here.  But even I get tired of writing things here; taking the time and finding the words to describe my thoughts just right. 

So today, I would like to share with you something that is pretty personal– honestly, I’m a little nervous about posting it. I attempted to write a song… just cause. And I don’t know that it’s any good. Because like I said earlier, music is only something I listen to, it’s not something I “do.”

So here goes nothing. Comments are welcome as always, just be gentle.

What I Wish I Knew
1st Verse
Waiting might be harder
If finding you was impossible
But I trust the One that made me for you
So until He moves
You are what I wish I knew
 
No one else will do
It can only be you
 
Chorus
You are what I wish I knew
No matter where I go
In all that I say and do
It all comes back to you
And what I wish I knew
 
2nd Verse
You don’t need to know where to go
There’s nothing you need to do
Just walk with me into tomorrow
We’ll carry each other through
 
Cause no one else will do
All I want is you
 
Bridge
No matter how long
No matter how far
I’ll keep holding on
Til you’re in my arms
All my wonderings will flee
As soon as you’re here with me

Food For Thought

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“The heart,” Blaise Pascal said, “has its reasons which reason knows nothing of.” Something in us longs, hopes, maybe even at times believes that this is not the way things were supposed to be. Our desire fights the assault of death upon life. And so people with terminal illnesses get married. Prisoners in a concentration camp plant flowers. Lovers long divorced still reach out in the night to embrace one who is no longer there. It’s like the phantom pain experienced by those who have lost a limb. Feelings still emanate from that region where once was a crucial part of them. Our hearts know a similar reality. At some deep level, we refuse to accept the fact that this is the way things are, or must be, or always will be.

Simone Weil was right; there are only two things that pierce the human heart: beauty and affliction. Moments we wish would last forever and moments we wish had never begun. The playwright Christopher Fry wrote,

The inescapable dramatic situation for us all is that we have no idea what our situation is. We may be mortal. What then? We may be immortal. What then? We are plunged into an existence fantastic to the point of nightmare, and however hard we rationalize, or however firm our religious faith, however closely we dog the heels of science or wheel among the starts of mysticism, we can not really make head or tail of it. (“A Playwright Speaks: How Lost, How Amazed, How Miraculous We Are”)

And what does Fry say we do with our dilemma? The worst of all possible reactions:

We get used to it. We get broken into it so gradually we scarcely notice it.

(excerpt from Ransomed Heart)

None But Jesus

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Have a listen…

In the quiet, in the stillness
I know that You are God
In the secret of Your presence
I know there I am restored

When You call I won?t refuse
Each new day again I?ll choose

There is no one else for me
None but Jesus
Crucified to set me free
Now I live to bring Him praise

In the chaos, in confusion
I know You?re sovereign still
In the moment of my weakness
You give me grace to do Your will

So when You call I won?t delay
This my song through all my days

There is no one else for me
None but Jesus
Crucified to set me free
Now I live to bring Him praise

All my delight is in You, Lord
All of my hope, all of my strength
All my delight is in You, Lord, forevermore

A Heart for Achile UPDATE

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Howdy y’all… er, wait. *ahem* Hi friends! (Sorry, I just got back from Texas and my twang came back)

I wrote a piece earlier this month about a little boy named Achile from Burkina Faso.

I recently received more details and wanted to share them with you.  Here’s the scoop:

Achile is an 8-year-old Compassion-assisted boy with a congenital heart defect known as tetralogy of Fallot. Because of Achile’s heart condition, he has been in pain for five years and hasn’t been able to attend school regularly and receive the full of benefit of sponsorships through Compassion International.

Compassion has provided medical care that Achile has needed at the National Teaching Hospital Yalgado Ouedraogo in Burkina Faso in western Africa. However, doctors there now believe his condition requires urgent heart surgery, which is not available in Achile’s home country.  Without this operation, Achile would not live much longer.

Compassion has transported Achile to a specialized hospital in India for a lifesaving operation that will cost an estimated $20,449.

To donate to this operation, please go here http://compassion.com/Achile

Any funds raised in excess of the cost of Achile’s surgery will be rolled into Compassion’s Medical Assistance Fund to aid children in need of medical help in the future.  It is from this fund that Achile has been assisted for the last two years for pervious medical treatments.

I have not received any further updates on the day of the surgery at this point, but as soon as I know anything, I will update this post again.

Please prayerfully consider giving to this effort to fund Achile’s heart surgery. If you can not afford to do so, your prayers are just as valued and appreciated.

I truly appreciate you, dear reader, and would not ask this of you if I didn’t truly feel is critical.

More to come soon.

Donate to Compassion International Medical Intervention Fund

Bird’s Eye View

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As I was flying back to the majestic state of Colorado yesterday, I sat down in a uncomfortably small seat crammed next to the window.  Did these seats get smaller or did I just gain 20 pounds in the last twenty minutes?

As I struggled to find a comfortable way in which to sit for the next two hours, I grabbed my iPod, thinking that if in the event I was never comfortable, at least I would be distracted from my discomfort by some of my favorite songs.

There is something incredibly soothing and peaceful about flying to me, especially in the evening as the sun begins to set. It’s often that at 36,000 feet that I find my most restful state of being because I am simultaneously completely out of control of the plane and completely captivated by the scenery below me.

I know altitude has nothing to do with it, but I feel God’s presence a little closer. I feel him not hovering over me, but holding me entirely. And of all the places on earth, I feel the most at rest when I am utterly suspended.

As we began our descent into Colorado Springs, I looked out the window and I saw Pikes Peak getting larger and larger in my window pane. Below it I saw, perhaps for the first time, I lovely plateau. A perfect plateau.  It looked like something that would be seen in a Geology textbook.

And for whatever reason, I could not stop staring at it. It captivated me.  I wish I had taken a picture so I could show you. My description will not do it justice, but I will try my best.

It was a lush and vibrant as the sun spread its’ rays gently on it, reflecting the various hues of the grass. It looked like a blanket, welcoming a weary travel to come and rest. 

Plateaus are the middle ground between a valley and a mountain.

As I considered just how lovely it was, so perfectly placed between the valley below and Pikes Peak above, I heard…

This is where I have brought you, Meredith. I know you’re tired. You’ve grown weary in your strivings and I see your strength failing you, so come and sit. Rest here on My plateau of grace. Forget the valley you forged and don’t look to the mountain just yet. Be still here. Be quiet here.

I started just a bit. In that moment a breathed a little easier. All this time when I felt as if the Lord was being a little too still for comfort and when I began to fear His seeming silence, He was just inviting me to take a breather. Rest my feet. Drink some water. Have a meal. Gain a little perspective.  And take in the view.

From the plateau, the valley below was truly lovely. It was a place of cool shade, protection, and lush vegetation. From above, it was a beautiful thing– a refreshing site.

From the plateau, the mountain wasn’t an ominous, threatening thing, but rather a glorious piece of creation to behold.  With the sun setting behind it and the clouds illuminating colors that can not be described or duplicated, the mountain was breathtaking.  It was comforting.

Something so much bigger than me, that seems so insurmountable is not a hinderance– it’s a leg up.

That plateau changed me. It sounds dramatic and perhaps ridiculous. Think what you want.  But the picture of that plateau has become a source or peace and rest that I was looking for.

“They’re Real”

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One of the beauties of traveling is the over-heard conversations of fellow passengers.  That’s right. I eavesdrop.

Don’t tell me you don’t. Planes are getting smaller and the seats on them ever more so. You are uncomfortably close to perfect strangers whether you like it or not. One can only pray that they have something memorable to say to make the flight worth your time.

On my trip to Dallas, I struck gold.

I was sitting in the window seat directly behind a loud blond from Oklahoma. Next to her was a business man from Florida.

As we sat on the runway, waiting for clearance to take off, the gentleman, apparently new to flying, was looking out the window at all the little luggage trucks buzzing around.

“They’re real,” she said. Completely unprovoked.

“Excuse me,”  he replied utterly mortified. His face was priceless. He went sheet white. His eyes as wide as saucers and his jaw gaping open.

“I saw you looking. They get a lot of people’s attention and I’m always asked,” she explained.

“I’m uhhh. I’m sorry…. um.” He stammered.

“My nails. I saw you looking at my nails. And yes, they’re real,” She stated.

Aren’t awkward moments grand?

Montana in a Nutshell

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My week in Whitefish, Montana could be summed up in a few short phrases that, although out of context, help to capture the essence of this trip.

“I love having all my chicks in my nest. I just want to sit on y’all!” Momma Dunn.

And perhaps my favorite…

“Stick with me honey and I’ll have you dripping in diamonds bigger than horse turds.” Jewler-man in town.

There are, of course, more stories to share but I thought I would just give you a sneak-peak into posts to come.

Speaking of which– from Montana I am flying south to Dallas to spend the weekend with some extraordinary friends. So while I’m busy playing and have the time of my life with them, I won’t be here.

Catch y’all next week.