I Communicate… Cause I Don’t Compute


Research shows that women use nearly twice as many words as men do in a single day.  Estimated numbers vary depending on which website you choose to believe. But on the whole, they all agree that women talk a lot more.

It’s not surprising really. The bigger question, to me, is why do we talk so much to begin with? What in the world are we really saying? 

I can’t answer for every other woman, but I think I have determined my own personal “why”… thanks to my brother.

He asked my a rather simple question on the phone last night. “How are you, Mere?”  My response took about 7 minutes and never actually answered the question. And with a noticeable smile in his voice, he said “I think you just used a lot of descriptive words to say that ____________.” Sure enough; he summed it up quickly, accurately, and in a way that made more sense.  So why didn’t I do the same?

A long time ago, in 8th grade to be precise, my math teacher told me I was stupid because I asked too many questions.  In high-school, another math teacher said the same thing.  My last math teacher, in college, chimed in that she too agreed with their sentiments about my serious lack of intellect. Needless to say, I believed them.

So I decided that since that general consensus suggested I couldn’t compute, I would communicate better than anyone else. I decided that my vocabulary and ability to articulate would be my way of overcoming my lack of abilities elsewhere. I was determined to prove that I was smart; I wasn’t stupid. And if nothing else, my verbose intelligence would be what people noticed about me.

Now years later, I’m finding that even in conversations with my own brother I am striving to impress him with lofty words and really abstract metaphors.  Why? He wasn’t the one that said I was stupid.

I don’t know that I have completely figured it out yet, or pieced all the puzzle pieces together just so, but I have a general idea of why. I haven’t fully accepted that I am who God says I am; that I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  I wasn’t a glitch in the cosmic system. I was intended, purposed and equipped to do what no one else can do.  What that is exactly is still a little fuzzy, but this I know– it’s not math.  Someone else got that gene.

He says I am loved with an everlasting love. That I have been made holy, set free, and proclaimed righteous because of the cross of Christ. I am who God says I am.

That is reason enough to know that I can do what I am meant to do

And you are who God says you are. Just right, the way you are. On purpose.


About mndunn26

I recently realized that my life is somewhat of a beautiful mess. A "pollack-type-picture" if you will, of colors, experiences, and people that, despite the seeming disarray, is captivating & confusing; patterened & yet unpredictable. But most of all, it is mysteriously designed, purposed, and appointed. For what? I don't know yet... but I'm learning as I go.

12 responses »

  1. I need the names and last known addresses of said eighth grade, high school, and college math teachers. I have a piece of my mind to give them!!
    YOU, stupid?! This is one of the most rediculous things I have ever heard.

    LOVE YOU and your sweet honesty. Can’t wait to see you in a few months!

    • I have forgotten all their names… on purpose. The first teacher was an retired lawyer, which was her first problem. HA! The other two… not sure.

      Love you more! Can’t wait for Thanksgiving!

  2. Not to throw a wrench in your reasoning but I’m one of those who doesn’t necessarily have a lot of words to use over the course of a day and it’s certainly not because I’ve accepted who I am as who God says I am. Some people process their thoughts out loud and some process internally. That doesn’t make one group smarter than the other and it most assuredly doesn’t categorize you as any less intelligent than anyone else. Yes, you are who God has made you to be and part of what makes you unique is your ability to not only put words to your thoughts but express yourself and engage others in conversation. You are far more mature in your faith and more talented and intelligent than you give yourself credit for. That, my sister-in-Christ, is what is called humility. Yet another one of your many God given gifts!

    And, for what it’s worth, I wasn’t any good at math, either.

    • Great point, Ric. I always appreciate your insight and encouragement!
      Math is overrated. Leave it to the accountants and engineers. We have more personality!

    • I love and miss you so much! Thank you for reading– knowing that you do is such an incredible encouragement to me! Hope to see you soon!

  3. What those teachers failed to realize is that it’s the more intelligent students that ask all the questions. It means their mind is working.

    Great post, not-so-great teachers.

    • Agreed! Or at least their brave enough to admit they don’t get it:) Thanks for chimming in Judy!

  4. Well…it is a good thing I am just now finding out about these so called teachers…..and live 2,100 miles away from the closest one!…but besides that…the end result is that God will provide a man with lots of math skills or money so you don’t have to learn to subtract…because it doesn’t matter!

  5. I earned the nickname Blah-blah in Bible College, as if all I said were words of no meaning.

    and while it is true in the multitude of words sin is not lacking, I still like to think sometimes I have something worth saying.

    it was very nice to meet you, I really loved talking to you. And you did not strike me as pedantic, just someone with some interesting things to share.

    • It was so great meeting you as well! I was so excited that you were able to swing by the office and chat! Thank for reading, as always, and keep up the great writing!

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